In this module we will show that being aware of your emotions is important, especially when growing up.

What are emotions?

An emotion is an affective state in which joy, sorrow, fear, hate etc. is experienced, as distinguished from reason or will. Emotions are our ‘thermometers’, measuring what is really going on in and around us.

Emotions are usually accompanied by bodily or physical changes, like increased heartbeat and sweating.

Why do we have emotions?

Emotions lead us. We are led by more than just reason (thinking). When something happens or when we observe something, we often feel an emotion, then we think, and then we act.

Emotions can be recognised through facial expressions or other physical reactions like crying, shaking, or body posture.

Examples of emotions

Some emotions and their corresponding facial expressions are universal across human cultures.
Universal emotions are:

• Joy
• Disgust
• Sadness
• Fear
• Surprise
• Anger

There are numerous possible emotional reactions that will greatly differ per situation, person and culture.

Cultural differences

Specific emotional responses, as well as a group’s interpretation of their significance, may be influenced by cultural norms.
Different societies deal differently with emotions such as love, hate, and the desire for revenge.

What in one society will be considered cruel may provoke responses of enjoyment in another society. Or, talking about sex may be normal in some cultures, while this would provoke shame or disgust in others.

In other words:

Emotions and the way you react to them depend on social conventions, expectations, norms, and behaviour of the group in which you live.

Survival

Our emotions have the potential to serve as a delicate and sophisticated internal guidance system. Our emotions alert us when a natural human need is not met.

For example, when we feel lonely, our need for connection with other people is not met. When we feel afraid, our need for safety is not met. When we feel rejected, it is our need for acceptance, which is not met. Thus, emotions urge us to go and look for that connection, safety, and acceptance – all needed for human survival.

Decision making

Our emotions are a valuable source of information. Our emotions help us make decisions. Studies show that people with brain damage, whose emotional connections do not work properly, can often not make simple decisions.

Why? Because you need to know how you will feel in order to make your choices.

Boundary setting

When we feel uncomfortable with a person's behaviour, our emotions alert us. If we learn to trust our emotions and feel confident expressing ourselves, we can let the other person know we feel uncomfortable as soon as we are aware of our feeling. Or we may decide to keep our distance from that person.

In any case, emotions help us to set boundaries, which are necessary to protect our physical and mental health.

Communication

Our emotions help us communicate. Our facial expressions, for example, convey a wide range of emotions.

If we look sad or hurt, we are signalling to others that we need their help. If we are verbally skilled we will be able to express more of our emotional needs and so have a better chance of fulfilling them. If we are effective at listening to the emotional troubles of others, we are better able to help them feel understood, important and cared for.

Happiness

The only real way to know that you are happy is to feel happy. When we feel happy, we feel content and fulfilled. This feeling originates from having our needs met, particularly our emotional needs. We can be warm, dry, and well-fed, but still unhappy. Our emotions and our feelings let us know when we are unhappy; when something is missing or needed.

The better we identify our emotions, the easier it will be to determine what we need to be happy.

Children's emotions

For children to develop healthily it is important that they learn to recognise their own emotions. They need to realise why they have certain emotions, to learn how to express their emotions in a culturally appropriate way and how to deal with their emotions.

A child needs to learn that when they are angry, that they should not become physically aggressive towards others, but must try and talk about their emotions with peers or trusted adults. Or when children are afraid they need to understand why they are afraid (“Am I in danger? Then I should look for support from someone”).

The ability to express and deal with emotions, as well as being able to recognise and deal with the emotions of others, are powerful coping mechanisms that will enhance children’s resilience in difficult situations.

Goal of the module 'Dealing with Emotions':
The children have gained tools to recognise and deal with their own emotions and those of others in constructive ways.

Sessions:

1. What are emotions?
2. When and how do you react?
3. How to deal with emotions?

Session 1: What are emotions?
Goal: The children have learnt to recognise different emotions and to differentiate between these emotions.

In this first session you will help the children to become familiar with the concept of emotions. Some may not even know the word. If you, being the facilitator, give examples the children can identify with, or give examples of your own emotions and vulnerabilities, the children are more likely to open up.

Session 2: When and how do you react?
Goal: The children have gained a better understanding of their own emotions and their reactions to these emotions.

The second session will trigger the children to think about their own emotions. You will invite them to identify what is happening in their hearts and minds and facilitate them to talk about their feelings.

Session 3: How to deal with emotions?
Goal: The children have learnt how to deal with their emotions in constructive ways.

In the third session, you will put forward different situations that could produce strong emotional reactions. You will make them aware of the effect of their reactions on other people. They will learn about alternative reactions to strong emotions.